It took 2 weeks but I have realised that my job cannot be done on a part time basis. I simply run with too many projects with too short deadlines with too many very senior people looking at them and although my boss is being very good, Asia is not geared up for this.
I was getting tired and annoyed at not doing my job very well and not being doing the mother thing very well either. Something was going to have to change. Thankfully I have a boss who is a) Swedish so very family friendly b) likes me and we get on well c) knows I do such a specialist job that finding a workable solution is preferable to him having to replace me.
So now I work from home two days a week, and so far so good. I can shut down my laptop and brain at 6, have found I am stupidly productive at home, and much happier for the odd cuddle during the day. I have also finally found a great way to spend my lunch breaks, playing with my delightful little bundle of fun.
This working mother thing isn't easy, but I am determined to figure it out. You just need a few people to cut you some slack and work extra hard when you are there to show you are still pulling your weight.
Email exchange of the week:
Me to boss: "I would like to leave the meeting at 6 if possible because I am still nursing and want to be home by 7, hope this is OK"
Boss to Me in reply: "Of course! Food must always come first!!"
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